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Posts Tagged ‘widowed parents’

A_Widow's_Pursuit_Cover_for_KindleSometimes it’s hard for me to remember just how painful life was when I first became a widow. In my book, “A Widow’s Pursuit: Finding Out There’s More to Life than Grief”, I spent a substantial amount of time grieving. I had to! There’s a time in life for everything.

Fortunately, I made sure that God led me through. I made it a habit to pray for every decision I had to make. When I felt his peace, I took that as a sign I was on the right path. When I didn’t feel his peace, I took that as a sign it was not his will and changed my path.

As my grief subsided, and my new life unfolded, God promised me joy and the blessings are still coming, 23 years later!!!

My 2 daughters, who were 6 and 7 at the time their Daddy passed, have grown into the 2 most beautiful women a mother and father could only imagine!

IMG_0550Jessica (the oldest) became a nurse and married Brandon, who have 2 children of their own, Caleb and Isabelle, with another on the way!!! (For anyone that knew Jessica or has read my book of all the challenges of raising her as a single parent, only God can take credit for the transformation in her life!)

 

IMG_0121Nicole (the youngest) obtained a communication degree and married Teigan, who have a daughter, Mila. Even though they live cross country, I know that God continues to watch over her and her family. That gives me comfort!

 

 

In 2009, I found love again and married Joseph. At one time, I didn’t think this would be possible, to love again. I have been blessed beyond belief.046

And now Joseph’s daughter, Emily (my step-daughter), will be getting married this year to Randy. God is good and answers prayers!Emily and Randy

There IS a time for GRIEF, however, there IS a time for CELEBRATION and JOY as well!!!

 

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Financial picAn article written by Tamara Holmes helps widows find a way to build their credit.

A couple things included are:
A downloadable widow’s financial checklist
Financial resources for military, elderly, and widows with young children

Losing a spouse is one of the most traumatic experiences one can endure. If you are a widow, the emotional toll can be compounded by financial challenges. However, credit can be used strategically to help you get through the tough times and rebuild your life.
Each year, more than 700,000 women in the United States become widows, according to Widows Well, a service that strives to help widows make sound financial choices. For these women, the financial impact can be devastating. Read more….

This article also includes being aware of scams that target widows. Unfortunately, widows are a target for being taken advantage of financially. As if widows don’t have enough to be aware of already! Share resource with others to spread the word!

 

 

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Visit the website for additional info!

Metromusictherapyga.com/songs-of-hope

Songs of Hope 2017 Summer Camp

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Kids Camp offered through Crossroads Hospice Charitable Foundation

Do you know a child who is grieving due to a recent loss?   We still have openings for our Kid’s Camp sponsored by Crossroads Hospice Charitable Foundation!   Our camp is overseen by credentialed and licensed Clinical and Master’s level Social Worker and Psychology staff.  Our camp staff and volunteers are highly trained and specialize in grief and loss.    Kid’s Camp has designed fun, interactive activities for the children, age 6 to 12, to bond and share, play and gain tools to help them with their grief.

For some reason I couldn’t get the link to copy…so please go to the following website for more information. Sorry!

https://crhcf.org/Crossroads-Kids/

A place for grieving children to connect.

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Cropped pictureFrom my experience, as a young widow raising children, this is not an easy answer. First, I had to work through my grief. There’s no specific time limit for grief. It’s when a widow has worked through the stages and has accepted the loss. For me, it took two years before I could see the light of joy again.

I believe the parent must first work through grief to be capable of entering into another relationship. If they don’t, they could have unresolved grief and the children might have compounded grief. However long it takes, widows must work through their grief to then help their children complete theirs.

Once I was in a healthier state of mind and accepted my loss, I then realized my children still had a ways to go. After two years of widowhood, with an 8 and 9 yr. old, I had a marriage proposal. I really had to pray about it. A counselor told me that children can take on average four and a half years to work through grief.

So I put my heart and wants to the side. My children were my top priority and I had to make sure they resolved their grief before I moved on. I had them in support groups and children’s grief camps. I brought them to see counselors when I saw it was appropriate. And I always prayed for God’s direction!

So all my sacrifices and hard work paid off! It has produced the most beautiful joys and rewards. It wasn’t easy! I did remarry once my children were grown and on their own paths in life. My one daughter is married and my other is engaged. They have both been making very good decisions in their lives. Read my book to find out all the details of how the three of us made it through.

A Widow’s Pursuit: Finding Out There’s More to Life Than Grief

 

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I hadn’t thought about it until my daughter was engaged and the wedding plans began. Then it occurred to me one day, “I should be the one to walk my baby down the aisle. I spent the most time raising her!”

All my sweat and tears, for 14 years as a young widow, doing the best I could for my daughter. I was so proud of her, not to mention how much I loved her. I was honored to walk my precious daughter down the aisle and give her away to the man of her dreams. It was so beautiful and bittersweet!!

Down the aisle

 

 

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This past year, September 19, 2013, I had the opportunity to speak to a H.U.G.S. (Healing Under God’s Sovereignty) Grief support group in Deltona, FL. My dear friend, Carol Keefer, who facilitates this ministry for grieving parents, arranged a weekly meeting where I shared a message about FILLING THE VOID.

Losing a child is quite different than losing a spouse, however, any void that results from a loss of a loved one, has to be filled with something. The following youtube video is the message I shared with these grieving parents and I’d also like to share it with anyone that has a void to fill during his or her grief.

A Widow’s Pursuit: Filling the Void

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=SHE7ilbwuzs

A special “Thank You” to my friend, Lisa Dolce, for helping me put this together.

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