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Archive for the ‘Answer to Prayers’ Category

 

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This year, Tate Publishing and Enterprises, who published my memoir, “A Widow’s Pursuit”, went out of business. I did some edits and it’s back on Amazon with an updated 2017 version.

Get your copy now…A Widow’s Pursuit

Or buy a copy for a friend or family member who is going through grief. Grief is not only about losing a spouse or loved one, but a devastating change in our lives where a loss occurs. How do we get through and find a new normal? In every situation, there’s one sure way to get through grief and find joy, love and happiness again. Read my story!!

To update my 2017 version, my baby, Nicole, and her husband Teigan, are expecting their first baby this coming March! So soon I’ll have 3 grandchildren!!!! Life goes on…..

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Cropped pictureFrom my experience, as a young widow raising children, this is not an easy answer. First, I had to work through my grief. There’s no specific time limit for grief. It’s when a widow has worked through the stages and has accepted the loss. For me, it took two years before I could see the light of joy again.

I believe the parent must first work through grief to be capable of entering into another relationship. If they don’t, they could have unresolved grief and the children might have compounded grief. However long it takes, widows must work through their grief to then help their children complete theirs.

Once I was in a healthier state of mind and accepted my loss, I then realized my children still had a ways to go. After two years of widowhood, with an 8 and 9 yr. old, I had a marriage proposal. I really had to pray about it. A counselor told me that children can take on average four and a half years to work through grief.

So I put my heart and wants to the side. My children were my top priority and I had to make sure they resolved their grief before I moved on. I had them in support groups and children’s grief camps. I brought them to see counselors when I saw it was appropriate. And I always prayed for God’s direction!

So all my sacrifices and hard work paid off! It has produced the most beautiful joys and rewards. It wasn’t easy! I did remarry once my children were grown and on their own paths in life. My one daughter is married and my other is engaged. They have both been making very good decisions in their lives. Read my book to find out all the details of how the three of us made it through.

A Widow’s Pursuit: Finding Out There’s More to Life Than Grief

 

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The Godly Widow Confiding in the Widow's GodIn my widowhood, over the years, I can now look back and see how much I listened to God’s voice by the way my life turned out. My transformation began after my spouse’s death by surrendering my trust over to God. Proverbs 3: 5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not  lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him. And He will make your paths straight”.

Living in this world can be very confusing when a loved one has passed. There’s a lot we don’t understand. We don’t know what the after life will really be like. We only know that we have to trust God that He knows best and has our best interests at heart. I craved to be closer to God knowing only He could get me through grief.

The first thing I did to hear from God was to pray. I prayed for direction in my life. I prayed for my children without a father. I prayed for God to watch over and protect my children because I couldn’t always be with them. Rarely did a day go by without having a prayer to start my day. Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind”.

The second thing I did to hear God’s voice was to be obedient. This began at a time when I was desperate and God was all I had. It seemed the more obedient I was to God’s Word, the more the channels were open to hear from God. I rested every Sabbath (Sunday) and kept it holy. Though I dated, I reserved ever having sex again unless I got remarried. You got the picture. It was really a simple equation for me: Prayer + Obedience = Hearing God’s Voice.

The third thing I did to hear God’s voice was to listen and watch for signs. Sometimes it was a feeling of peace that washed over me when I was doing what I felt He wanted me to do….

Two years into widowhood as I prayed for direction in my life, I considered a move to Puerto Rico to live with my in-laws for a year. I felt my two daughters, 8 and 9 years old at the time, would benefit from having the love of their father’s family ingrained in their hearts forever. I just happened to cross paths with an individual that had moved to Puerto Rico for a year and he stressed how beneficial it worked out for him. I considered it a sign and began working towards that goal for the following summer. It wasn’t easy and it was a huge sacrifice for me. I had to rent out our home in Florida then pack our belongings and car in storage for a year. But everything fell into place PERFECTLY. That’s when I felt God’s peace and knew I had heard His voice!

Sometimes there were signs after I prayed that seemed so obvious….

Five years into widowhood, I had journaled 450 pages of my grief journey. That summer, at a friend’s home, I was typing them up on my vacation. Each day I’d spend a few hours every evening typing up a chapter. On the third day, I was wondering if this was worth it. I prayed to God that day for a sign to continue this laborious project on my vacation. As I was typing up my third chapter that evening (being obedient), my friend came rushing into the family room. “Cindy, you have to watch this program that is on!”. It was titled “Mere Coincidences” about spiritual occurrences that happened after loved ones passed and signs that they were still around. My mouth dropped, I said, “Carol! Look at the title of the chapter I’m typing up tonight!” I flipped it over to the title page and it revealed, “Mere Coincidences- or signs from above?”.

And so I completed my book, “A Widow’s Pursuit, Finding Out There’s More to Life Than Grief”.

And not only did I hear God’s voice through the years, God also heard my prayers. My daughters had God as their father growing up and are now 2 beautiful young ladies pursuing their own goals and dreams in which I am so proud of!

 

 

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This is my Gallery of Pictures of our Family:

Fam Photo

Casual Day Hanging Out- Some still in Pajamas! : Nelson, Cindy, Jessica & Nicole

 

Fam Photo 2

Dressed Up to go Somewhere- Visiting Family in Puerto Rico

 

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Dad and his Girls at home, with Shiba our Doberman

 

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Dad and Girls with Shades On

 

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Loving Our Daddy- All set to go!

 

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Beach Day with Daddy

 

Puerto Rico

Celebrating Mom’s Birthday in Puerto Rico (the year we lived there)

 

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Mom and Daughters on Mission Trip in Costa Rica

 

Mission Trip

Jessica and Nicole Making Friends with Children in Costa Rica on their Mission Trip

 

Cruise

Carribean Cruise: Cindy, Jessica, Nicole & our Friend April

 

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Jessica is going to be a Mommy

 

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Easter with Cindy, Joseph, Jessica & Nicole

 

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Jessica, Brandon and my Grandson, Caleb, in Puerto Rico

 

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Our Present Family in 2013 on a Vacation to Puerto Rico

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Puerto Rico 2013 020We all need a break. Especially after we complete a life time goal. I completed my book, “A Widow’s Pursuit”, last year. I self-published it, put it on Amazon, and then threw a couple book parties to celebrate my accomplishment. After that, I converted the hard-copy into a kindle version to reach more readers. I know I have more marketing to do, but the book is done.

If I add up the time it took to journal, attend a writer’s group, (now that’s pain and suffering!) write endless drafts, have it edited, and have others read it for reviews and comments, we’re talking a total of about 17 years. An interesting fact is that I knew my first husband, before he died, for about 17 years!

So I closed this chapter of my life and celebrated my achievement. I choose to splurge with some of my closest family. My present husband, Joseph, agreed to a family vacation to Puerto Rico with our three daughters, my 4 year old grandson and his daddy. Seven of us in PR celebrating life!

Since my first husband’s parents still lived in Puerto Rico, it felt like a grand finale when we reunited and brought our blended families together. My daughters and I had traveled there several times and we also lived there for a year. So going back, one more time, felt like the circle of life was complete. It was a place I felt peace, joy, and purpose. It was a wonderful break this summer!

So what’s next? I’m planning to continue my pursuit to reach not only young widows, but others that are going through grief. There’s a purpose for everyone’s pain and suffering. It’s just a matter of pursuing God’s peace to help us through our darkest moments. During this time, our faith will grow and our purpose will be revealed. It’s actually a simple formula that promises us, life can be joyful and purposeful again!Puerto Rico 2013 068

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In the book, I Believe In Healing, there are stories not only from the Bible, but from people that are experiencing miracles today. These are stories that can’t be explained by natural means and it reminds us that God is the same yesterday, today and forever!

I was able to contribute to this book, one of my own true stories of healing, “A Serious Back Injury”. My testimony along with others can continue to strengthen our faith and trust God during times of sickness and injuries. The book is being sold on amazon as a hard copy or kindle version. A great gift for anyone needing more proof that miracles still happen! Click here to order.

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERALori is not only my “Book Designer” but a very special friend. I believe God places many of our friends in our lives for a purpose. When I moved to Georgia, Lori was my next door neighbor. She was an exceptional Graphic Art Designer for Coca-Cola until her life took a sharp turn. Marriage moved her 2 hours out of the Atlanta area. Although we don’t get to see each other as frequently as we’d like, we find a way when we can. We had fun working on the book cover together since it gave us an opportunity to get together. Soon after, she was able to celebrate with me at my book party!

Lori was part of an answer to my prayer, for finding the perfect cover for my book. On the first afternoon of searching the web, together we found the picture that I wanted to use for my book cover. Everything fell perfectly into place. It’s amazing when you feel God’s hand in the process. I don’t doubt for a minute that we didn’t have Divine Intervention!!! Every detail was covered. And having the best Graphic Art Designer was all part of His plan, too!

Visit Lori’s website: Lori’s Art & Photo Gallery, to see more beautiful art and paintings she has done.

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